Thursday, September 20, 2012

Let's Be Real

*Let me start this out by saying that I have more good days than bad. I don't completely bash myself in any way. I just need to get this out so that I can start to move forward.*

Here it goes: I'm a fat girl! I have not always been this way and I really don't want to stay this way. I weighed myself on Tuesday and was absolutely disgusted by the 177 that popped up. That's 5 pounds above my "normal" 172. I've been 172 for the past 4 years. I can't even blame being pregnant with 2 babies the last 2 years. I was 172 when I got pregnant with Seth, lost it all, got pregnant with Caleb, lost the baby weight and stayed at 172. And in the last month I've gained 5 pounds that doesn't seem to be going anywhere. I have been taking some amazing vitamins & dietary supplements, and I honestly feel better, but they're not going to melt away the fat! Back in February we bought a pretty expensive elliptical machine. We rekindled our love/hate relationship today. I know why I am overweight, I know what I have to do to fix it, I am just full of excuses. Today, I declare NO MORE! I don't want to be a fat girl. I want to be happy & healthy. I want to feel confident in my own skin, no matter where I am or who I'm with. It's not going to happen over night. It's not going to be easy. But it will be worth it! I constantly feel like I am being judged based on how I look. When, the truth is, I am constantly judging myself. And what I say to myself, in my head or out loud, is not very nice. It's not healthy. It's not good. So, again...NO MORE!!!! I am committing to positive self talk, affirmations, post its on mirrors, exercising, making better food choices, etc. It may seem silly but reading positive words out loud to yourself can do wonders. I used to do this a long time ago. So, I am working on my notes and putting them up where I can see them. Not just in my bathroom, but places I spend the most time-the kitchen, by the boys changing tables, in the car, I need to be able to see them often to remind myself that this is a journey and I am worth it. I am also going to quit making excuses to not exercise-my kids are my reason not my excuse! I am also going to be a product of my product. My It Works products are amazing! I am using everything consistently enough that I should begin to actually see changes soon. I am going to start the meal replacement shakes too. I think that will really boost my weight loss efforts. The most amazing product though is this crazy little wrap thing called the Ultimate Body Applicator. I cannot even begin to tell you how amazing it is. I am going to go way out of my comfort zone and post my very own before and after pic. This is really hard for me to do, so I'm begging you, please don't judge, if you don't have anything nice to say then please don't say anything. (I have tears in my eyes just typing this) That's how hard this is for me-because I'm ashamed and embarrassed. But the whole point of this post is to get out of my comfort zone and begin to make a change. I don't want to be a fat girl anymore. I want to be a happy, healthy, attractive wife, mommy, friend.

(After 2 wraps, 4.5 inches lost)
(Also using Defining Gel)
So good bye fat girl!
Hello, Happy~Healthy~Soon to be Wealthy~Me!

3 comments:

  1. You are amazing, Amanda ~ and, such a beautiful friend/wife/Mommy ~ on the inside and out! I'm cheering for you!

    ReplyDelete